I hope noone shoots me for making such a long post, but i found this on a site i was surfing. I found it to be quite humourous.
-= Host on MSN=-
NO PAY - NO RECOGNITION - NO PROMOTIONS - NO BENEFITS - NO MEANING - NO LIFE
Ever wondered if YOU could be a MSN Host?
If you can answer YES to any of these questions.. YOU QUALIFY!!
*
Application for becoming a host on the old days of MSN:
1.Do you believe spending 60-100 hours a week online hugging people and kicking porn from chat rooms is a GREAT LIFE?If YES you qualify.
2.Do you think that it's OKAY to ignore your real job, real friends and/or family because hosting comes first and foremost?If YES you qualify.
3.Do you think it's ACCEPTABLE to remain UNEMPLOYEED for months or years a time because hosting in chat rooms is a better alternative?If YES you qualify.
4.Do you believe putting mystical fantasy images in your profiles makes you more powerful and/or like a SUPERHERO?If YES you qualify.
5.Can you gain 20 pounds a month from sitting on your ass in front of your computer 14 hours a day?If YES you qualify.
6.Are you willing to give up such things, such as fresh air, a clean yard, family functions, school functions for your children and/or offline activities?If YES you qualify.
7.Are you a single parent that never leaves the house?If YES you qualify.
8.Do you agree that talking to your cyber buddies is more important than feeding your children and/or spending time with them?If YES you qualify.
9.Do you smoke at least 2 packs of cigarettes a day and/or consider yourself a chain smoker?If YES you qualify. (Nicotine stains on your keyboard gives you extra points)
10.Do you drink Cherry Coke and eat Twinkies?If YES you qualify.
11.Do you live off of the government?If YES you qualify.
12.Do you think you are in some way better than all the other chatters because you have a EMOTICON HAMMER by your nickname?If YES you qualify.
13.Do you believe it's OKAY to be disruptive, vulgar, rude and have pornographic MSN communities, yet ban any non hosts who do this?If YES you qualify.
14.Are you a hypocrite?If YES you qualify.
15.Would you rather sit in an EMOTICON tea cup than look for a job?If YES you qualify.
16.Do you live in a trailer park?If YES you qualify. (Extra points for double wide users)
17.Can you cyber chatters and/or cuss like a sailor in whispers?If YES you qualify.
18.Were you related to your spouse BEFORE you were married?If YES you qualify.
19.Do you believe you are an IRC hacker, because you can run a welcome message with a bot?If YES you qualify.
20.Have your children eaten more than 2 times in the past 72 hours?If NO then you qualify.
21.Would you rather talk to people you will NEVER meet in chat rooms than have SEX IN REAL LIFE?If YES you qualify.
22.If there's a girl with a porn link in her profile but your grandma needs medicine, What do you do first?If you chose KICK PORN over GRANDMA you qualify.
23.Do you believe it's OKAY to lie about things like being doctors, attorneys, astronauts and/or rocket scientists?If YES you qualify.
24.Do you believe it's HEALTHY to spend 30-100 hours per week kicking porn?If YES you qualify.
25.Do you think it's NORMAL to spend your life kicking porn out of CHAT ROOMS for FREE?If YES you qualify.
26.Do you understand that no matter how much porn you kick, it will never make it go away and only make it MULTIPLY by the dozens?If YES you qualify.
27.Do you agree that being a host gives you a fake sense of power?If YES you qualify.
28.Have you ever been network banned?If YES you qualify.
29.Do you understand that volunteering your time makes absolutely no difference in the world and/or anyone's life?If YES you qualify.
30.Do you realize 99.9% of chatters do not like or respect hosts?If YES you qualify.
31.Do you realize there is no recognition, MONEY and/or promotion in hosting your life away?If YES you qualify.
32.Have your children aged since you took your eyes off your monitor?If YES you qualify.
33.Have you lost your job, because of late nite chat room romps?If YES you qualify.
34.Are you OBESE or have a pancake butt?If YES you qualify.
35.Do you think moving your mouse from left to right is exercise?If YES you qualify.
36.Do you know who the current U.S. President is?If NO you qualify.
37.Can you gossip and/lie constantly?If YES you qualify.
38.Do you smell a funky odor in the next room?If YES you qualify.
39.When ISPs started offering unlimited service for a flat monthly fee, did you have an orgasm?If YES you qualify.
40.When cable modems and DSL came to life, did you sell your car to get the installation?If YES you qualify.
41.Do you have more people on your buddy list, than you had showers this year?If YES you qualify.
42.Do you have more than one computer so you and your mate can both be online typing in the same house at the same time?If YES you qualify.
43.Have you ever attended an online party and/or online wedding?If YES you qualify.
44.Do you refer to your family as "things that bother me when I am listening to a new wave"?If YES you qualify.
45.Do you have poor circulation?If YES you qualify.
46.Do you know Johnny Carson no longer hosts the late show?If NO you qualify.
47.Would you rather spend 7 hours downloading an MPEG movie than go to a REAL movie in a theatre?If YES you qualify.
48.Do you have a dead parakeet in a cage and/or dead fish in a tank?If YES you qualify.
49.Has child protective services ever visited your house?If YES you qualify.
50.Do you call your boyfriend/girlfriend by their NICKNAME? (Hey BigStallion9238!)If YES you qualify.
51.Have you ever brought a laptop to a funeral?If YES you qualify.
52.Was the prom the last date you had?If YES you qualify. (extra points if date was related)
53.Would you give up food before you gave up your computer?If YES you qualify.
54.Do you know more shorthand abbreviations (ie LOL, LMAO) than names of planets in our solar system?If YES you qualify.
55.Do you wear mu-mus and/or housecoats all day, every day?If YES you qualify.
56.Do your neighbors allow their children at your house?If NO you qualify.
57.Can you pretend you have such a full, hobby and/or career filled life, yet secretly spend 50-100 hours a week in chat rooms?If YES you qualify.
58.Do you think NICKNAMES with character map letters make you COOL?If YES you qualify.
59.Do you wake up and get in a chat room before you pee?If YES you qualify.
60.Do you feel your blood pressure rise, veins pop out, face flush and/or head hurt when you get MOOFIED?If YES you qualify.
61.Have your children ever come home with notes attached to their shirt reading : "Please wash his clothes"?If YES you qualify.
62.Has your driver's license expired and you don't care?If YES you qualify.
63.Does your grocery shopping consist of a trip to the kwik-e-mart and/or 7-11 for chips, dip, ding dongs and a Coke?If YES you qualify.
64.Does the pizza delivery guy deliver to your bedroom?If YES you qualify.
65.Have you ever tried to teach your 65 year old mom how to use WHISPERS so you can talk to her without having to sign offline?If YES you qualify.
66.Do you believe banning someone for 24 hours lasts a full 24 hours?If YES you qualify.
67.Do you realize most porn has 700-1200 passports, if not more?If NO you qualify. (extra points for being in denial)
68.Do you realize most porn runs on mIRC scripts that auto-reloads and/or is never banned to begin with?If NO you qualify. (extra points for being in denial)
69.Do you have more macros than money in the bank?If YES you qualify.
70.Do you have an extra phone line for emergencies? Emergencies being, if the main line is short circuited and you need the other for your modem.If YES you qualify.
71.Do you feel superior behind your computer?If YES you qualify.
72.Do you think you can feel all tingly and euphoric when you kick a person out of a chat room?If YES you qualify.
73.Can you preach the Code of Conduct, put your hammer away, sign in another passport, that has a nickname that's a violation, go back in the same room you TRIED to control and then break every rule MSN ever created?If YES you qualify.
74.Would you be willing to ignore your momma at Thanksgiving dinner to kick some porn?If YES you qualify.
75.Do you believe you do more work and or are better qualified than the MSN Guides?If YES you qualify.
76.Do you understand kicking porn has absolutely NO MEANING IN THE WORLD?If YES you qualify.
77. Do you believe you can clear porn off the network faster than Service_bot?If YES you qualify. (extra points for what you were smoking when you answered yes)
78. Do you belive that MSN chat is nothing without you?If YES you qualify. (extra points for your reality check bouncing)
79.Do you agree that hosting would be THEE most important thing in life and would devote your entire life to it?If YES you qualify.
80.Do you understand that no one is/will be/was impressed by your emoticon hammer/power?If YES you qualify.
81.Are you a control freak?If YES you qualify.
82.Are you willing to waste your time and life, to ban people that bounce back in under a minute?If YES you qualify.
Sign Here X________________________
I agree wiv you there Spooky on the bit about peeps liking the "msn theme" ... but its no good having an "msn theme" if you dont have peeps chatting .. now as for vsixc as often as I can .. I like to chat in the lobby lol just wish a few chatters would reply 
